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How can you handle a divorce with a narcissist?

Even the most amicable divorce can become difficult, but it is even worse when your ex seeks conflict. Worse, if you suspect your ex-partner is a narcissist, you may not know how to handle the divorce proceedings.

The Huffington Post explains that you have to handle divorce with narcissists differently than other proceedings.

Is your ex a narcissist?

How do you know if your ex is a narcissist? A few common narcissistic traits include:

  • Lack of empathy
  • Being the center of their universe
  • Pinning all blame on others

Even if you try to be kind, narcissists may still act out and attempt to harm you.

How can you prepare for the divorce?

To prepare for a divorce, make sure that you collect as much evidence as possible. Document every conversation that you have with your soon-to-be former spouse. You want to keep screenshots from your phone, sending messages from your email and any audio recordings. If you have phone conversations, record every one of them. Whenever you see proof of aggressive behavior or abuse, capture it to show the court.

How should you talk with your ex?

In many cases, an amicable divorce is easier if there is communication between both parties. When dealing with a narcissist, you may not have the option for open communication. Do not try to rationalize with your ex-partner. You will only expend energy that you cannot afford. When you give into an argument, you essentially take the bait and wind up doing exactly what the narcissist wants.

When it comes to a divorce, narcissists want to win. While divorce should never be a competition, he or she may make it one through trying to win more property or gain full custody of your children.


Christine S. Cook has earned a reputation in the legal community for her professionalism and among her clients for the care and personal attention she gives to every case.

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